Dennis Meinl-Weston AsKew was born to a wealthy Bavarian immigrant family in Massachusetts in 1642. When he assumed control of the family pest control and wig-making businesses, he bet it all on the invention of the wheel. He lost his fortune when it was discovered that the wheel had been patented by Bill Gates a decade before.
Armed only with determination and a very nice wig, then-Mr. AsKew enrolled in evil medical school with plans to dominate the world undergarments market. As it turned out, evil medical school was in fact a pyramid-scheme, where students invested in “degrees” and instructed on how to sell more of these “degrees” to other potential “students.” For some odd reason, Dr. AsKew graduated with a tuba, and the two have remained close ever since.
